The Spinning Plates

First; My sincere apologies for being absent for I think two weeks. My ALS fatigue got really bad. My typing skills have gotten so bad that my grand daughter Lynette is typing for me. Yes I know i need Dragon and I know what it is but i need help and i keep asking and nobody helps: such is life.

Second; I don't know when i will be able to post again but I am going to shoot for once a week. The days of Gene Chapman posting to my blog once a day, have passed.

Third; My daughter and four of my grand kids are down from Pennsylvania are kickin' butt, takin' names, and solving problems. My "honey-do list" is backed up for years. Also, the refrigerator died and Sharon had to run and get a new one last week.

Last but not Least; I go for an EKG on Thursday to establish a baseline for the experimental pseudo bulbor drug, the false emotions are becoming a problem.

Now onto the point of Today's blog; I realized this morning while Sharon was getting ready for work how hard these past few months have been for her. It made me come up with a mental image that i am going to try to communicate with you and I am going to start out with two images; one is a plate spinner, you know, a person that spins plates on wooden sticks or dowels and the second one is a neutral gray and empty room.

Close your eyes, think of my wife or someone that is very close to you is standing in this room. Next, put that person on a unicycle (a one wheeled bicycle with a seat and pedals). The person you have imagined here is struggling a little staying balanced because they're not used to this unicycle. Now imagine this person on the unicycle spinning a place on a stick. Imagine if you will that this person has over 100 spinning plates in their hand and they're using the other hand to keep all of those plates spinning. This is what my wife, Sharon, has been doing since January 23rd, 2010, when we got the diagnosis of ALS. If you can consider even taking the place of this person you can fully imagine, the words that might describe how you feel; frustrated, angry, confused, overwhelmed, irritated, etc. It horrified me to even think that my dear wife who I have been married to for 29 years next month had endured days of this dilemma, let alone months.

The reason I came up with this image was to convey a truth to my wife and I: "If everything is thrown at you, mistakes will happen!" Because of this truth none of us, myself included, should ever beat ourselves up, put ourselves down, or think of ourselves less than who we are. When your riding a unicycle, spinning over 100 plates, some plates are going to fall, hit the ground and break. I thought about the next part and discovered that the real trick is spinning the plates that matter and doing the best i can on all the others. The best i can do is all anyone can expect.

I am going to leave this entry right here for right now because I want to convey the feelings of what a sinful world we live in. This disease sucks, I hate it and I do want to be healed from it. But, as long as father says no, I will take each day as it comes, make the best of it and let his grace be sufficient. I am thankful for my family and especially my wife: she is truly a gift from father.

Have a blessed week, I love all of you, continue to pray for Sharon and I: I think the light is showing up at the end of the tunnel... Gene
P.S. My granddaughter Marci listened to it and my granddaughter Sarah editted and made corrections. Each one gave and I gave back, a kiss of love. Thank you Sarah, Marci, and Lynette.

Perspective............

Today is a slow day for me........I didn't want to get up today. Nope, nine, not at all. BUT, life still goes on. I didn't want to stay in bed all day. Besides, I had to get up and Pee. Maybe that's my motivation, plain and simple. Consider & vue this link:

http://www.space.com/php/multimedia/imagedisplay/img_display.php?pic=herschel-galaxies-100528-02.jpgcap=Thousands+of+galaxies+crowd+into+this+Herschel+image+of+the+distant+universe.+Each+
dot+is+an+entire+galaxy+containing+billions+of+stars.+This+image+image+was+taken+in+a+
region+of+space+called+the+Lockman+hole%2C+which+allows+a+clear+line+of+sight+out+into+
the+distant+Universe.+This+%22hole%22+is+located+in+the+familiar+northern+constellation+
of+Ursa+Major%2C+The+Great+Bear.+Credit%3A+ESA+%26+SPIRE+Consortium+%26+
HerMES+consortia

The previous item is what I am going to talk about today; I didn't plan on it, but It just came up & it got me thinking. The link is above and it will take you to a pretty color picture. ( I hope you can click on it & not have to type it in.) If you scrool down, you will see the description. Each colored dot is a Galaxy, just like or similar too our Milky way Galaxy. In each of those Galaxies are at least several billion stars like our sun. Around most of those stars are planets like the planets that exist in our solar system. Does anyone want to count those dots?

This image is just from a 1 degree arc of sky from the Ursa Major (the Great Bear/Big Dipper) portion of the sky. Your fist, is about a 10 degree portion of the sky. Sooooo, this image is taken from a portion of the sky that is 1/2 (half) the width of your finger!!!! (It's from the year old Infrared Herschel Telescope. It can see though gas & dust particles.)

Now please, stop and think about the SCALE of this picture....... Do you HONESTLY think that this all happened by LUCK, Chance or happenstance? Or, as I believe, that this Universe, Galaxy, Solar system and planets were made by Intelligent Design. I/We call this Intelligent Designer GOD/FATHER/PAPA. I futher believe that FATHER desires to have a relationship with me (he sent his son, didn't he?) AND has provided a way for him & I to have a relationship (the Holy Spirit) through the dance we call LIFE! I may not like my choices, or his choices, but I love him, just the same because he first Loved me! Did he have me or each one of us in mind, when he created the "Lockman Hole" as that picture is being called? I would like to think so or BELIEVE so. Since he did and he desires, so desperately, desperately enough to send his son to make a way, so that every one of us has a way to meet up with him and relate to him; not just for a brief moment, but for an eternity!

This thought just blows me away, just plain away. Even my meager description does not do the picture or Father, Son, Spirit, or my belief ANY justice. Just think, it all started with getting out of bed to go Pee. Now consider the irony in THAT thought................. Love, Peace & Understanding, Gene

First Tuesday...................

Good morning to all!!!!!! I hope everyone had a safe, fun, enjoyable holiday... As promised, I didn't even touch a computer or a cell phone while I was on holiday, which was OUTSTANDING!!!

First thing, first: ALS clinic was FANTASTIC! Many thanks to all involved but especially, Susan, Val, Debbie, Dr. B & Elke. Many tips, tricks & exercises! I go back in Nov/Dec 2010 for a 6 month follow-up. I really enjoyed the premarital discussion with Elke.

Drug study day: Went VERY WELL, INDEED! All my muscle performance stats were unchanged. No Gallbladder sludge (it was 100% clear) My. in-depth breathing performance was 81%!!! That is only off by 3% from Feb/2010! The spascisity has gotten a bit worse, so we have upped the muscle relaxer(s). (I hope Sharon will buy me some bottles of Merlot!). The good news: Virtually no change in the ALS since the baselines in April/2010!!!!! Looks like I will make it to at least Thanksgiving & my Grandson's wedding! Now for the bad news: the Pseudo Bulbar spells (inappropriate crying & laughing) has come on. They have medicine they can give me to eliminate those spells that are not anti-depressants. I have to find a pharmacy that still can mix drugs at the correct ratio.

After Jacksonville, we did a four hour drive, with one stop for the sake of my butt, to the Villages to see my dear sister-in-law & brother-in-law Sandi & Tom. We spent, late nights, plenty of laughs, some glasses of Rose' and some tears, and we had a happy & fun filled time by all. Sharon got some time off for caring for me, some time with her sister & started an Ebay store by the name of "JESS's Place; go check it out! Kudo's & thanks to Katey & tater tot, Mike & Kelly & Paul & Suzanne for all stopping by; It was a joy to see each & everyone of you; Thank You.

I learned some things about life in general & myself specifically, that I will share the rest of this week, so stay tuned for more! I am very sore & tired from over exerting myself, so I will go and rest up. A recent news bulletin: My daughter, granddaughters and my grand-daughter-to-be will be here either June 10th or that following weekend! Some very important young women that are exceptionally important to every one down here, especially to me!!!!! Since my grand-daughter-to-be, Natasha, has never been to Florida; we need to make plans for Disney, Universal & Seaworld, the Springs, the Beach & the Gulf of Mexico!!! Plenty of SPF lotion too!!

Well enough of micro managing what we all are going to do; I am just glad I have the ability to do those things, still!!! I notice we are up to eighteen followers on the blog, WOW!!

Love, Peace & JOY......, to all, Gene